Down Under Thunder

In what seems to be a totally genius idea, Kylie Minogue will be recording a song written by none other than A.R. Rahman. The Australian pop nymphet is currently in Mumbai filming the song and dance number alongside Akshay Kumar in the Bollywood movie Blue.

I don’t know about you, but I love Kylie. Her over-the-top dance numbers, cheesy pop lyrics, sparkly costumes, and incessant toothy grin seem perfect for the likes of Bollywood. Plus she survived being dumped by Oliver Martinez, battling cancer, and at 40 she’s dating a hot male model 10 years her junior and dancing alongside Akshay Kumar. If that isn’t a Bollywood ending I don’t know what is.

Slum No More

Woo!! Slumdog Millionaire CLEANED up at the Oscars!!! Just as in the movie, in real life the underdog came out on the top. Not only was the movie almost relegated to direct-to-video, the cast is almost entirely unknown (except for Anil Kapoor and only amongst Desis), and most of Danny Boyle’s movies have been commercial flops. This is definitely one time when Oscar got it right.

In other Slumdog news, Nicole from the Pussycat Dolls has announced that she is recording her own mix of the song “Jai Ho.”. Apparently she found the movie “spiritually uplifting.” Wow, I can’t wait to hear that piece of crap!!!

And finally it what is a surprise to no one, bitterella Salman Rushdie proves again that he is an imbecile. In critiquing Slumdog Millionaire, Rushdie says that the movie is “full of impossibilities.” No shit Sherlock!!!! It’s a movie!!! Besides the idea of a 60 something, chubby, balding, short writer marrying a gorgeous model seems next to impossible but it happened. Thanks Einstein for the rousing critique.

Tony!!!!!

Yea!!!! No Doubt announced they will go on tour this summer. Join desi boy Tony Kanal, Gwen Stefani, and the rest of the gang this summer.

Says Tony, "Get there early...this is going to be a great night from the moment the lights go down."

You heard the man, buy your tix soon!

Madame Aishwarya

Aishwarya Rai for Madame Figaro magazine.